I am so sick of everything. I hate everything. I hate feeling missery. I hate never being good enough. I hate being me.. I just wish I was someone other than myself. I don't even care who. Being anyone else would be better than being me.. I suck.

Why do I feel like I'm always fucking everything up? I'm so sick it. I just want to be done.with everything.

Why does emotional pain have to hurt so bad? Why does it always seem as if the people that I trust most and expect will never hurt me end up being the one's who hurt me the most? Am I naive for believing people when they say they won't hurt me? Or am I just vulnerable?

begging, dekat public lain. nampak tak kebibaian dia.

im not asking more. just seeking a guy who done perfectly his prayer. lets make it part of the deal.

u dont asking my permission. i dont need ur permission either :)

Well, yesterday didn't go as I wanted it to. I was so nervous for some reason. I hate how I blame myself for things that I know are not at my reach, or fault I should say. I guess some things, no matter how hard you try, will swerve and go in complete opposite direction. I hope there will be another try. It seemed right, but then again it might not. I feel that at times I overact on things and when I look back, I feel like I've over-tried. Sort of in a way that I almost feel ashamed. Or maybe regretful is the word I'm looking for. I do know one thing, and that's that this helps a lot. It makes me feel that someone out there can hear me. At least read what I feel like. Even though no one probably cares, I at least can get this out of my mind. I've also found that just going out for a long, pointless car ride helps clear the mind. You think to yourself and most importantly, leave what you want behind. Until next time, take care and peace.